


Infinity (and Beyond)

by JFox (JewelQueen)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Doctor Strange (2016), Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: BAMF Frigga (Marvel), BAMF Loki (Marvel), BAMF Tony Stark, Destroying the entire MCU canon, Gen, Infinity Stone Shenanigans, Infinity War Fixit, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Odin (Marvel)'s A+ Parenting, Other, Personal Theory, Time Loop, Time Travel, Tony is very confused
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-23
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-01-25 14:34:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18576463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JewelQueen/pseuds/JFox
Summary: So, Thanos happened.  The "Snap" happened, and Tony watched all of his new comrades in arms dissipate before his very eyes.  His arm hurts, his heart hurts, everything hurts andPeterisgone...He closes his eyes...and when he opens them again, he is no longer on Titan.  He's not even lost in space.  He's back in New York--from what he can tell of the place--staring at an all-too familiar cast.  But, wait, they look a lot younger, less haggard and the Hulk is back?  When did that happen??Oh...Oh no.This can't be real.Fuck his life.





	1. Two: Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To those of you desperately awaiting updates on my (aka JewelQueen) other WIPs, I promise they are coming! But, until then (and until I cry my heart out when I finally get to see Endgame), I am going to be trying to update this monstrosity daily to help me get back into the groove and get a jumpstart on my 'career' switch over.
> 
> So this started as basically my own personal theory about what might happen in Endgame (as I am firmly in the camp of no trailers, no news, no nothing). It's based off of an interesting thing I noticed with the merchandise BoxLunch was selling right after Infinity War came out and then spiraled out of control. I wanted this to be an epic one-chaptered fic, but because I put it off for so long and hit so many writer's blocks, I'm giving it to you periodically for now and then I'll fix it up in post once I get closer to the end and/or get a chance to see Endgame.

**Two**

“Mister Stark, please. I don’t want to go.. I don’t want to go, sir, _I don’t want to go_...”

\--

He gasps aware, cradled in the Hulk’s hands and surrounded by the Avengers of years ago. Intellectually, he knows exactly where--and _when_ a part of him notes hysterically--he is, but those last moments were so real that it overrides everything else. He jerks out of the Hulk’s grasp, rises unsteadily to his feet and puts some distance between him and Rogers because nothing can fix that relationship ever again, not even a fresh start. He knows he must look like a crazed maniac--even he’s not too sure that he’s not. Spontaneous time-travel? Impossible. Vividly intense false memories brought on by random nerves firing prior to death (or almost death as it turns out)? Possible, but not probable to this extent. That’s not how brains worked (he thinks) and he’s never had such lucid dreaming abilities before. Plus, the introduction to other-worldliness in a very literal sense and mystical stones created since the very dawn of existence is beginning to call into question previously held notions of physics and general universal truths.

If all of that--any of it--was even _real_.

“Stark?” Rogers calls out questioningly, taking a step forward and he can’t stop the flinch fast enough. 

Well, apparently, at least his body believes it was.

“Fine, fine.” He dismisses quickly, trying not to sound as if his internal monologue isn’t one giant 'what the fuck what the _fuuuck_.' “Just having a hard time with the whole restarting my heart bit. We, uh, we still have a guest to see to. Chop, chop. My tower, last one-smelly egg, you know the drill.”

Better to get this all over with, whether or not it turns out to be actually real--(he sure hopes not, but he thinks that type of luck dried up in Afghanistan)--, and ease his peace of mind one way or another.

Not taking--much less proposing--a break for shawarma or perhaps his overt and sudden skittishness only highlights their lack of cohesion and comfortability as a unit without being on an actual battlefield against a common threat. Being stuck in an elevator together to reach Loki only makes it clearer and Tony does nothing to hide that. Why should he? Every single one of his so called teammates took arms against him at some point in some form--if that was indeed the future he lived through.

It’s hard enough not to cry when he hears JARVIS speaking to them again. To have to go through all of those memories(?) and sort through the deep rooted feelings attached to them--he just can't. It's too much. So he does what he does best, deflects his own thoughts away from the emotional distress threatening to overwhelm him and focuses on their most immediate problem that he can actually handle: the demigod that started it all.

Despite the differences this time around--in this universe?--Loki is still only just picking himself off the floor and they surround him in just the same manner. He even still says that dumb line: “If it’s all the same to you, I’ll have that drink now.”

He can’t help the snort that escapes. It’s such a normal phrase after the day--years??--he’s had, that he--

“Jarvis, what color are Loki’s eyes?” he asks, brain whirring away as his heart starts to panic.

“Green, sir.”

_Fuck._

“Loki’s eyes are green,” he repeats quietly, to himself mostly, then louder with a not very well strangled tinge of hysteria. “His eyes are green!”

“Aye, Stark,” Thor responds, with a furrow to his brow. “Loki’s eyes have always been green.”

Loki catches on a breath before Tony speaks, those eyes in question widening in alarm. “ _No_ , they _haven’t_.”

Tony physically staggers under the realization, eyes darting back and forth while he tries to compute what exactly this means for everything that happened--will happen? Fuck. This was a test--but did that mean they failed (well, obviously, eventually, he saw _that_ )? Or was Loki trying to help them win with his double-agent mind-whammied act? If he came for the Tesseract, was that on Thanos’ behalf; is that what Thanos was actually after--is he even sure that Thanos was behind _this_?

“What did you see in the Beyond?” Loki hisses. “Is the _Other_ there?”

Well, that answers at least one question...possibly. How likely is it that there are two big bads out there collecting infinity stones and possessing the resources and desire to be a threat to Earth even before possessing them? (How likely is any of this?) But why would Thanos go after the Tesseract by giving up--no, not Thanos.

 _Loki_.

“You _asshole_.” Tony snarls, feeling white hot rage course through him. This must be what Extremis feels like before overloading. He takes a step towards Loki and delights in the way he skitters back. “You goddamn idiot, you’ve _doomed_ us. This is all your fault!”

Thor suddenly blocks his path and the visions of the future pause for a moment. “If what you say is true, Man of Iron, then Loki was not of his mind. He is not to be blamed.”

“He means to hide the Mind Stone on Earth!” He shouted. “Hydra will get their hands on it--”

((“Wait, Hydra?” Rogers asks. In his peripheral, he notes the way he and the spies glance at one another. It’s obvious they’re scrambling through their combined history and knowledge to find evidence to deny his claim while also being suspicious enough to automatically believe it on some small level. He ignores them.))

((Thor stills at the mention of an Infinity Stone by name, protests dying under suspicious moue from scars too close to the surface.))

((Bruce is--he can't really tell, but he thinks he must be finding a corner to make himself small in or run away, possibly with a tinge of green. He can't worry about that right now.))

“--And then the twins will fuck us all up and U-Ultron--but Vision...and Thanos will come here for him!”

Loki tries to sneak away but Tony’s on him in an instant. “Oh, no you don’t,” he seethes, easily darting around the still contemplating Thor in his anger and picking him up by the collar. “You don’t get away that easily, you bastard.”

“Have you not heard?” His eyes are wide and although Tony knows he’s not gripping him anywhere near close to strangling, Loki’s hands go straight to protect his neck. “I’m innocent in Asgard’s eyes, and therefore--”

“ _I will skin you alive, you Jotunn son of a bitch_ ,” Tony hisses, pulling in the demigod close enough to watch the fear dilating his pupils. “Do you have any _idea_ what you’ve done?”

“I’ve crafted your little team.” He spitballs wildly. “I’ve given you a taste to prepare yourselves--”

“You’ve given us nothing but _death_. Do you wanna know what happens, huh? Your little scepter causes a lot of bad shit to go down, which tears apart the team you ‘crafted,’ so there goes that hope. You die, your precious All-Mother dies, Thor never comes back and probably dies, Bruce just...I get stuck in space and very nearly die by Thanos’ hands, and then half the universe is gone with a snap of his fingers and I had to watch as _my kid_ dies in my arms, helpless. So, _excuse me_ for not being _grateful_ about your ‘preparation’!”

His chest is heaving in the suit and he’s busy shoving down the urge to actually strangle Loki while he has the chance, that Barton has time to redirect everyone’s focus.

“Wait, hold on, timeout.” He even makes that “T” motion. “Since when do you have a kid?”

_'Mister Stark...'_

Tony shakes his head, releases Loki with a little stumble, hands weak, throat thick with bile, as he blinks away the grief. This was so much worse than when he thought he heard Pepper calling out his name during his spontaneous surgery, certain that he was going to die in a cave forgotten and unloved.

“I don’t.” His voice is like sandpaper to his own ears and he resists the urge to scrape away all the way through to his eardrum so he never has to hear it again. “I don’t, he--not like yours, but maybe--”

“What.”

Barton’s voice is devoid of any emotion and Tony realizes that he’s been a little too free with his knowledge--the “curse he shares” with Thanos, _dammit_ \--and he crossed a line that Hawkeye wouldn’t forgive. They only found out about his super-secret agent-family under duress the first time--original time?--and that was back when they “trusted” one another.

Tony swallows before he turns to face him. _'Better watch your back with this one'_. “He’s not my biological kid, not like yours.” Breathe, Tony. “What’s-his-name...Callum, Connor--?”

“ _Cooper_.” Barton grinds out. The tightness in his voice makes Tony freeze if only to stop from running away.

“Whatever,” he manages with more blasé attitude than he feels--which is none, at all.

“No, not ‘whatever’. _No one_ knows about them, not even SHIELD, so how do _you_?”

“SHIELD finds out eventually. You guys live in a safe house--well, technically it’s a farm, but still, our last resort after--”

“How. Do. _You_ know, Stark?!” Barton yells. Tony winces, feels green eyes watching him with a mixture of pity, sympathy and also vindication.

“He ventured into the Void and the Void ventured into him,” Loki speaks in his defense, soft like a feather falling to tip the scales in his favor after all the accusations. “The Norns have blessed him with foreknowledge so that the Well of Urd may be satisfied by the events-that-come-to-be on which Yggdrasil feeds.”

“He is Norn-Chosen?” Thor asks, mostly to himself as he continues with barely a pause and a simple concise nod, “Then he must away with us at once to Asgard, brother.” 

Loki stares at him as if he is hallucinating--which Tony still hasn’t excluded as a possibility for himself. Scars heal quickly for Asgardians then--or maybe just Thor, since Loki is still his prickly self. Must be nice.

“What?” Tony hears himself interject, once he shakes himself out of his head. It is almost missed over Barton’s still simmering anger in between Roger and Romanoff’s murmurings. For all he knows, Bruce disappeared. It's not like it would be out of character for him, after all.

“The All-Father must hear of this,” Loki explains in a mutter to Tony alone, all while keeping a calculating glance on Thor--sibling suspicion returned after his own mind cleared itself. “He needs to know what you have learned from your cycles in time and how to--”

“Wait, cy- _cles_? As in more than one?”

Loki finally turns and his face sharpens with a smug gleam in his eyes before something clicks and the smugness melts away into something more slack-jawed. “You mean to say this is only the first time you’ve journeyed?” He shakes his head with defeat in his voice. “It is the Mad Titan we speak of… _of course_ you are so beleaguered.”

“There is also hope to be had, brother,” Thor interrupts, a gentle hand laying claim on Loki’s shoulder. The end of Loki’s lip curls like he has caught a particularly sour scent, but he does nothing about the hand itself. “Our universe is yet young and full of luck and also our friend Anthony has travelled long in his first try.”

“We’re not.” Tony stutters out, feeling out of breath once everyone’s eyes are back on him. “Friends, we’re not--none of us are. Not after--not _anymore_.”

“We hurt you.” Romanoff speaks up. Tony jerks at her silent approach and she quirks her brow, studying and reading into his his every microexpression no doubt. “You feel betrayed by us all, but the Captain most of all. You avoid looking at any of us, but whenever he moves or speaks, you back off completely. You make sure there is _distance_ between you.”

She cocks her head, letting her hair fall as she inspects him more. Tony’s breath continues to evade him with persistence. “Was it because he was your childhood idol or--no, of course not, not with the first impressions you guys had of each other. You thought we were a team.”

“Family,” he choked out, flicking a glance to the actual resident family members. Breathe. He makes sure to look her in the eye after. He wants her to know this. “We were supposed to be a family, but there were...secrets.”

“Clint’s family. Ultron,” she guesses.

“My _parents_.” His knees shake. He needs to sit down. His arm feels numb.

“Adopted?” The conclusion doesn't make complete sense--the jumps of reasoning are there, but nothing to back it up; she only offers it to get him to volunteer information in correcting her. He knows her method after having fallen for it one too many times. He wants her to _know_ this.

“Murdered. By a ghost.” He glances down at the scar she never revealed to them--or rather, to him. “‘Bye-bye, bikinis,’ was it?”

It is her turn to blanch. Aborted hand movements leaving just a twitch towards where his eyes pierced her. “Невозможно…”

((A dark part of him wants to twist the knife further, wants to see how far he can press on old wounds and if he can make her bleed from them. He ignores that too.))

“Is it though?” He takes her hand and untangles the fist she made. She glances at it and blinks twice, testing her fingers with a gentle flex in his loose hold. “You fought him once; can you guess why he’s so familiar?” Tony purposefully lets his his gaze slowly drift to Rogers so she follows his path. She inhales sharply.

“All this time...Hydra?” He nods though by the way her eyes dart back and forth she had already come to that conclusion without his help. “And Steve didn’t tell you. There was a fight--”

“There was a _slaughter_ ,” he can’t help but snarl. “If I hadn't gotten rid of my reactor--”

“He would have killed you-god, _Tony_. Oh my god.” She slipped her hand away from his, blinking rapidly before returning to look him in the eyes, shoulders squared. “What did I do?”

Tony smiled bitterly. “You sent me to him.”

She recoils as if he punched her. It’s beautiful, and too late to heal the fracture made. She knows this too, and doesn’t waste time on an apology. Not that she has any.

“Okay, I think we all need to take a step back and start from the beginning. A lot of info has been thrown around and we need a debrief on our battle yet anyway--”

“Since when have you ever listened to what I have to say? When have you ever _wanted_ to?” Tony snaps without fully meaning to; Rogers always has the worst timing and pushes all of his worst buttons. Well, that’s not entirely fair. There’s a lot of history between them--some, even, from before they actually met in person--that is responsible for a lot of the heatedness of their interactions.

Rogers straightens like steel--or perhaps like the vibranium that makes his shield, unbendable and destructive when wielded so--and Tony, for once, since this all started, is transported _back_ in time to the Helicarrier when they first properly exchanged words. All cold bite underneath a sparkling golden facade. At the time he thought boy wonder was all bark and no bite--a man so out of time that he posed no threat to a futurist such as himself. But he knows better now. Knows exactly what lies behind the shiny veneer of Captain America; Steve Rogers, a man who would do whatever it takes to rally against injustice as he saw it. Even if--especially if--that so-called injustice was by Tony's hand.

He takes a step back. Romanoff edges over closer by him almost the same time that Loki does and they both notice with a measuring stare and slanted eyes.

“Since it apparently involves me pretty personally.” Rogers says slowly.

Tony snorts, eyes wide still. He can feel how fragile he is with the way his heart is hammering in this outdated suit, beating up against the back of the metal casing of his arc reactor again. Even years of upgrades can’t hold a candle to the Captain if he so dares, and right now, there’s only the thinnest thread of goodwill (and lack of a threat to a certain _best_ friend) as opposed to years of teamwork and trust holding him back. And still, so much for that. 

“It’s always personal with you,” he can’t help but mutter.

Rogers takes a step towards him. Tony’s heart leaps into his throat and bile coats his tongue. No, no, no, no, _no_. Not here--not _now_. He’s woefully vulnerable, the arc reactor heavy in his chest like a bullseye straight for his heart. One swing at that this time and--

“I must insist that you stand down, Rogers,” JARVIS speaks up, startling everyone, especially Tony himself. His home defense turrets--a throwaway idea that became something more, like Pepper’s “twelve percent”--unsheath themselves from the ceiling tiles and point at the Captain with the safety on. It’s a show of force more than a threat after all. “Or I will _make_ you.”

Well, maybe more of a threat than he thought.

“It’s okay, Jay,” Tony says, licking his lips. “I’m fine.”

“Fine has variable definitions, sir, fine is unacceptable.” JARVIS parrots back to him and he feels a quirk of a smile appear. Science fiction was always his guilty pleasure. But, well, maybe there’s more truth to it than he thought after all, what with the seeming time paradoxes that make up his life now.

“Enough!” Thor, surprisingly, shouts, laying Mjolnir on the ground between the Captain and Tony. Electrical impulses pulse like waves towards both of them, washing over them harmlessly but enough to startle them into taking a step back and redirect their focus. “Your petty squabbling has gone on too long--the fate of the universe is at stake here!”

“All the more reason for a debrief then,” Rogers mutters, sticking to his guns one last time. Tony wants to tear his hair out--at least that would be suitably dramatic enough to get his attention and maybe even stop to make him listen for once.

“You demand for more than you can trade.” Thor immediately snaps back. “Virðuligr-Anthony is the only one of you mortals I am honor-bound to consult with--do not forget that your leader shot the killing blow to our enemies at us first.”

“I wouldn't call him our leader…” Rogers mutters a bit sulkily.

“Then you are a warrior without honor following the commands of one who would betray us for a quick resolution.” He bends down and hefts Mjolnir back into his hand--without taking his eyes off of Rogers, Tony realizes with a buzz of astonishment.

Rogers narrows his eyes. “I don't think that's fair. This was a one time arrangement of necessity--we all just met!”

Thor inclines his head. “True. But even if I am wrong in my current judgement of you, it matters not as Virðuligr-Anthony does not trust you. Neither does his hidden servant.” He turns to Tony and raises his brow. “How do you wish to proceed?”

Tony sucks in a breath, taking a moment to process the near giddiness he feels at having Thor not only defer to him but fight for him against Rogers. After Ultron, he was sickly glad that Thor wasn't on planet to take a side since he was 90% sure Thor wouldn't take his. He's suffered his thunder and hammer, and suffered his squishing hands, he doesn't think he can take any more abuse from a former ally.

At the same time, he doesn't rejoice in their disenfranchisement--now or in the past/future. He never has, despite what many of them think or will think. He also knows that he can't let his personal feelings get in the way of literally the end of half the universe.

He closes his eyes briefly on an exhale before responding. "Rogers is right, unfortunately. We do need a debrief--but I don't care about our 'battle' and I'm not going anywhere near SHIELD." Tony glances at the spies. "You two can go back if you want, but you won't be able to leave without signing an NDA until we figure out what the hell is going on."

Barton scowls but Romanoff elbows him and nods. "Then we might as well stay." Rogers says nothing, arms crossed.

"Very well," Thor speaks. "Let us have this debrief."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations & Notes:
> 
> Well of Urd & Norns - Like the Fates of Grecco-Roman myth; Urd is basically the pot that Yggdrasil grows out of and is akin to destiny/fate. For the purposes of this fic, the Norns are caretakers of Yggdrasil and by default the Well of Urd. So in our universe/timeline, when an event happens that is so terrible that Yggdrasil is harmed by it, they bless whomever they term most capable with the foreknowledge to change it. However, there is no guarantee that it will be made better and only so many chances available.
> 
> Невозможно - "Impossible"
> 
> Virðuligr - essentially "honorable", a made-up title for one who has incurred favor from the Norns and other such beings of high status and power. Comes from Vikings of Bjornstad: http://www.vikingsofbjornstad.com/Old_Norse_Dictionary_E2N.shtm


	2. Two: Part Two

_"Tony...this was the only way."_

The cold water is like a literal slap to the face, but doesn't really do much aside from the temporary bout of pain. His eyes quickly run over his face in the mirror, but what shows in his reflection is not his face. It hasn't been his face for _years_. It doesn't bear the stress lines around his mouth from panic and worry and frustration and anger. There are no tiny hints of laugh lines around his eyes from the very few good moments interspersed in all those years he has to live through again. His forehead does have some marks of his deeper, introspective thinking but not like the creases with age (and sometimes wisdom) that he had gotten used to. But his eyes...it's like they haven't changed at all. Scrutinizing the individual parts of his face may make him uncomfortable--he is, after all, just staring at proof of time-travel within his own body or something to that affect--but actually looking back at himself, in the way that doesn't lie or cover up that he _has_ gone through all those things _is_ agonizing. When he looks into his eyes, all he sees is the heartache and loss from Titan. That 'windows to the soul' crap might be true after all. 

Curling his hands around the edge of the sink, he hangs his head with a sigh. He sent the others to Floor 76, directing Thor to take his pick of any of the empty meeting rooms along with having him order whatever he'd like to dine on--making it clear that it was also up to him to decide whether or not the other original Avengers were included in the dining process. But the idea of eating together after everything almost sent Tony into a panic attack. Hence, the...this. It's a lot to take in. The time-travel, possible loop for all eternity based on his potential and likely many fuckups, being charged with this responsibility by a higher power than Asgardians--of course he's going to freak out. It wouldn't be normal otherwise, right?

"This seems like a very inefficient way for cleaning one's self."

Tony doesn't exactly jump, but his shoulders meet his ears as he picks his head up--purposefully missing his own image to peer at the sudden appearance of Loki. "Please don't tell me you haven't showered since you've gotten here," he responds, flatter and more raspy than he expected.

Loki didn't say anything more, just circling around to his right and observing him for a moment. He breaks his gaze to look at the wall before he speaks. "I know my way around many worlds."

"Thank god," Tony laughs breathily. "I can't handle another Thor--man can't find his way around a toaster."

He thinks he peeks a small curve to Loki's lips, face still turned towards the boring, plain, metallic tiling. "He must not be so inept if you are willing to foist leadership in his hands during your absence."

It's not spoken like a question, but he can tell Loki's angling for something. He turns around, looks him in the eye. "I'm too mentally exhausted to do our usual tête-à-tête...what do you want, Loki?"

It still takes a moment before Loki does more than return his gaze. "What is your goal?" he asks in a whisper.

"We're literally having a debrief about that--"

"--Yes, but I need to know _now_ , Stark!"

He takes in his rigid stance, the coldness set into his frame. His body is so still, but his eyes are restless and if eyes are windows...

"You're going to leave." This time, he's doing the question-statement.

Loki's hands twitch. "If what you say is true...If my attempts to give Midgard an united front, if my--if Asgard falls, then everything I have ever purposefully sought to do in the name of good is worthless. Even my attempt at death has only brought misery." He chuckles, a dark and tired sound. "Mischief is my calling, but I do not want to do _evil_ , Stark. If, truly, I am a poison to the roots of this universe, then let me be freed of pretending."

Tony licks his lips. "Why trust my word? How can you be sure I'm not biased against you?"

"You are still Virðu-ligr; I must trust there is a reason for that." He pauses, eyes darting to the floor. "And you know my true ancestry. If I have _any_ value to you after all this...then I will gladly continue fighting my apparent nature."

He can't tell if this is all an act, nor what Loki might stand to gain from it. If he does end up running away and hiding from them all, ignoring the pleas for assistance against the end of the world, there is no point in telling Tony beforehand. It would have been better and easier to run off now while everyone is distracted. And if this is real, if Loki is actually coming to him for-for _reassurance_ , does Tony owe him that? He doesn't actually know much of Loki, and what he does know comes only from the little Thor has confessed to them. It's not very reliable, especially since he pulled the "adopted sibling" card nearly right away on the Helicarrier. Tony doesn't even really know _how_ Loki died. What good is his judgement when he knows barely anything?

What good is Tony, anyway, with his issues, with his loner tendencies, with his aversion to authority and playing nice, with his war-mongering history?

He sucks in a breath. "If you want the truth..." Loki's eyes--such a brilliant green--fill with resolve. "Then there's no answer I can give you that will ease your mind. The only thing I can say is," he continues, seeing the start of a cascade of disappointment in the dropping of his shoulders. "Thor trusts you."

Loki bristles right away. Tony wonders absently what he can actually do without the Stick of Destiny, because it looks like it might end up being setting people on fire with just a sneer. "Thor is a naive fool. He has never ceased to fall for any of my tricks. And you, yourself, mocked his incapacity for knowledge and yet you think _he_ wields some measure of power or control over _me_?"

"Don't forget I was there when you flinched at lightning--he wields something over you, alright," Tony snaps back.

"The oaf has brawn and the heart of a star at his command, of course his strength and temper is nothing to mock. Yet, a mortal--you, _don't forget_ very nearly bested him--what good is his esteem and trust to me, then?"

Tony grins. "So my esteem and trust is good to you, is that right?"

Loki falters, sneer turning into a frown, eyebrows drawn tight. "What?"

"You value my opinion, enough that you came to me and allowed yourself to be vulnerable for the sake of advice, and though I tell you something you don't want to hear, you're still here."

"The point, Stark."

"You trust me--whether I proved my worthiness to you or only because of the Norns--you accept that I have value not only to you, but the universe. And I trust Thor, at least, enough to make him my second in command as you pointed out earlier. So why isn't his trust good enough for you?"

Loki's eyes narrow. "I told you, he is a _fool_ \--"

"--But not enough of a fool to make him unqualified to lead in my place. You said so." Loki quiets again, looking away. Tony continues, softer, pressing his advantage. "No matter your ancestry, you guys _are_ brothers. And Thor believes in you--so why can't you?"

Silence again. Tony can hear his heartbeat in his ears, slightly fast but not out of fear. Loki inhales with his whole body, a gentle gasp like life flooding back into him, and he blinks the edginess away. "I think I have kept you long enough that they are no longer feasting." His lips curve with a knowing gleam. "You shall not have to worry about breaking bread with them, Virðuligr-Anthony."

Tony blinks, mouth falling open slightly. "What do you--I don't...what?"

Loki chuckles, warm and almost fond. "Are you ready now?"

"There's no way that was all a play!" He nearly splutters, arms flailing. "And how did you even...?"

"The best tricks and lies have an element of truth; how else would I get anyone to believe the God of Mischief?" He winks--the bastard _winks_ at him!--and then flits away.

Tony stares, more than a little dumbfounded, at the space he just vacated before a helpless laugh tumbles out of his mouth. He's not exactly 100% sure what just happened, but maybe--just maybe--they helped each other out somehow.

At least, that's what he would like to think. And that, strangely enough, does make him feel ready.


	3. Two: Part Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Endgame Watching for those of us who got the chance!
> 
> I hope you don't cry too hard...

\--

Loki is already situated at Thor's side, chin regally in the air as he supervises the hostile air directed at him from nearly everyone in the room from under his nose and a grin. Mjolnir rests on the table to his left, the light catching it just so to gleam every so often. Beside them both, obviously, sat Thor. He was angled so that his body was open to Loki, back slightly to the door and the others, being a presence to defend Loki but not so much that he is overbearing.

Barton sits in a tilted chair, tapping against the wall, next to the window with the best view of the room. Makes sense. Romanoff is next to him, almost like a barrier between him and Loki, arms crossed. Of course, he's not surprised by that either. There is an empty space, and then sits Rogers, almost directly across from Thor. He stifles the urge to roll his eyes. Bruce is...missing. Still.

"Jarvis," he says. No one startles; Rogers' eyes dart towards him but return to their fixed state on the Asgardians almost immediately, and Loki almost lazily slants his gaze over to him. It feels heavy. "Where's Bruce?"

"Doctor Banner apologizes, but wishes to avoid this environment as it is too distressing." JARVIS responds. Tony frowns.

"Does he want to video-in...?"

A pause. "Sir is most thoughtful, and he thanks you for the food, but...Doctor Banner sends his regrets."

After missing Bruce for so long, and seeing him for five minutes before the end of the universe began, he doesn't think his absence now should hurt so much. He swallows. "Well, uh, just let him know he's welcome to stay for as long as he likes, no catches. Any floor from 82 to 93 he can utilize...if he wants to, that is."

"I will do so, Sir." Nothing. He sighs. The man is like a legendary Pokemon's catch-rate when it comes to skittishness and attempts at befriending.

"Virðuligr-Anthony, are you ready?" Thor beckons.

"Yeah, sure, let's get this over with." He chooses to sit on Thor's free side and folds his hands on the table in front of him. "First thing's first, the Tesseract and the Mind--the Scepter can't stay on Earth."

"Shouldn't you be explaining the situation, not making demands?" Rogers retorts.

Tony tilts his head before shaking it. "Yeah, no. Frankly, I don't want to spend anymore time arguing, and if I try to tell you even the highlights of what I went through, that's exactly what we'd end up doing. And I don't trust you all enough to not go running to the wrong people. So let's say we did, and cut to the important bits. The cube and the pointy stick have to go."

"Why both?" Romanoff questions.

"Because the Tesseract is the only way to open a bridge back to Asgard, and if the Scepter stays here...well, the earth almost gets destroyed. Trust me, it doesn't make more sense if I explain."

"I think it's because you're hiding something." Barton snipes. Tony's heart skips a beat. He forgot--how could he forget?--that Barton is just as much a spy as Romanoff. Maybe not as experienced as she is, but he got his name for a reason.

"I'm hiding a lot of things," he says slowly. "That's what happens when you lived seven years into the future and then come back."

"Your questions are petty and trifling," Thor speaks up, leaning forward. "If Virðuligr-Anthony says it must be so, then by order of Odin, it shall be. His reasons are to be known to no one but the All-Father and whomever he desires."

"When I said we need to debrief, I meant more I need to debrief you guys on what is going to happen." Tony continues, grinning sharply. "Tell Fury or whomever you need to, but the three of us are going to Asgard to figure out how to defeat Thanos, and those two glow-toys of destruction are coming with." He leans back and waves his hand. "Go ahead, I'll wait."

Romanoff's chair screeches slightly against the floor as she pushed it back to stand and walk out the door, muttering under her breath.

"You really have some kind of nerve." Barton snarls not shortly after his partner exits the room. The legs of his chair hit the floor with a noticeable thud. "I mean, I knew you were arrogant, but to be this much of an asshole is something else."

Tony grits his teeth. "Just spit it out, Barton."

He slams his hand on the table. "You're just going to leave without telling me what you know about my family? The family no one knows about? Because you're so determined to whore yourself out for attention on some new planet, you can't be bothered to tie up your loose ends here on earth?"

"There are bigger things to deal with--"

"There's not!" Barton shouts. "You keep saying the end of the universe is going to happen--I'm not too sure how much I believe _that_ \--but you won't tell us what or how or when. You're teaming up with the enemy--"

"I resent that," Loki interjects, but it is easily swallowed up in the wake of Hawkeye's rage.

"--after having had your private little sidebar during the fight, making all these demands. You keep saying stuff without actually saying _anything_ of value, and contradicting yourself on the stuff that does. It's suspicious! My son was only just born, and you almost name-drop him when I've told no one?!"

"Romanoff knows," Tony points out weakly.

" _I haven't told her yet_ ," he says, exhausted but still with a tremor of steel that unnerves Tony. And then, it hits him.

Why would Barton need to have a safe house? He must have been recognized--or leaked by Hydra agents--at some point sometime during his mind-whammied state and needed to go underground for a moment or two. But he couldn't, not if Cooper was just born, leave his wife and child to be potential targets especially if no one knew to have them on protective detail. So he goes to someone he can trust, has always trusted, who has the kind of connections and skills to get him a safe house without tipping anyone else off--Romanoff. She was the only one of them unsurprised by the farm, the wife, the "tiny agents," when the Avengers dropped in, after all. And now Tony has just exposed that secret, before he got the chance to do it himself, in front of everyone--in front of Romanoff.

Oof.

"To be honest, I don't really care about what you have to say about the apocalypse, or whatever," he continues in that same tone. "Because my family _is_ my world. And if there's something that could happen to them, and you didn't tell me when you had the chance...oh, you better hope this is a one-way trip, Stark."

"Watch your words, little Hawk," Loki hisses. "Lest they resemble too much an offense."

Barton whips around to glare at him, beginning to snarl something in return when Romanoff returns, posture all business.

"Fury can only buy you until 1600 tomorrow. Best if you use a quiet spot in Central Park." Romanoff states, tone dead. Tony tries not to wince at it.

"Tomorrow at noon, Central Park, then." He confirms, but despite his confident facade he has to put forth in front of them, he's starting to have his doubts about all this. Every experience he has had so far going out into space has not ended well. And he knows better than to hope that this will be different.


	4. Two: Part Four

\--

When Thor and Loki left the first time around, they had a few more days to prepare. There was also less of a hostile undercurrent through all of their interactions because they had _truly_ felt like a group coming together after their first victory.  But that's not how it actually worked at all.  In the process of rebuilding Stark Tower after the mess Loki made of it, he had redesigned much more than the damaged sections.  Those twelve floors he offered to Bruce were all made personally tailored to each of the original members, with several rooms for guests or visitors, a fitness room fit for a super soldier or even a Hulk, a pretty sweet private theater, a full on military-scale medical suite, his former penthouse as their common area and a specific area for all their Avenger-related missions and debriefs.  He even gave Bruce security clearance for all of the SI labs and research on the lower floors beneath them.  And yet, Rogers maintained his own apartment, Barton and Romanoff were off at SHIELD for most of the time--Barton probably with his family at the farm, he realizes now--Thor was usually off-planet, and if he was on earth, spent whatever time he could at Doctor Foster's side, and Bruce didn't end up using much of the all-access pass he had given him but at least he was still around.  Not like this time.  Rogers didn't bother seeing them off, Bruce has ghosted ever since Loki's "capture," and Barton and Romanoff are only here on behalf of SHIELD and spite. But whose fault was that?

It wasn't by his own doing that he's here in either the past or a very similar universe--at least, he doesn't think so, he doesn't remember much after Peter...--but everything that is different now is because of _him_.  Because of his reactions, because of his words, because of his attitude, everything is different.  For better or worse--by god, he hopes it's for the better--it's all because of him.  And now, he's not going to be able to see exactly what he's caused because he's off to the Golden Empire for who knows how long and to do who knows what.

Oh god, it’s happening. It's only been just over half a day since they all "agreed" on a plan of attack but he’s not ready. He can’t do this.

No, he actually _can’t_ do this. Not yet.

“Romanoff,” he starts. She’s speaking to Barton-- who is still scowling--or didn’t hear him, so he tries yelling. “Nat!”

She actually startles and the twin spies stare at him with some type of shock and confusion. He thinks Natasha might be more bemused than anything whereas Barton is absolutely lost; his perplexion has turned his scowl into more of a pout. It would be funny to Tony if he wasn’t stunned himself by using her little nickname. But, well, that was Nat. Even after all her betrayals--some small, some not so small at all--he’s always had a bit of a soft spot for her; an understanding that allowed him to forgive if not forget.

Maybe she senses this, or maybe she can just read it in the lines of his body, but she half-jogs over to him, a placid, polite smile on her face. “Cold feet there, tin can?”

“No. Yes--there’s something I need to tell you. A lot of somethings actually.”

Her smile goes cold but not yet frigid. “And why tell me? You know I’ll only sell my secrets to the highest bidder,” she practically purrs.

Fuck, he miss-stepped somewhere. He frowns. Maybe all of yesterday with his verbal diarrhea, probably all of it actually. But he still has to try. “Stop that. I trust you--”

She laughs genuinely, as far as he can tell. “Then you’re either a liar or a fool--neither of whom’s trust I would actually respect.”

“Well, then I imagine you don’t have much respect for yourself, to begin with, huh?” he snaps back.

Her smile is more feline now. “Can’t be a Widow if you have any sense of self. Red Room’ll train that out of you.”

He can’t tell if that’s supposed to be a threat or not. Like Barton’s secret family, she didn’t go into the details of her history with anyone on the team--other than maybe Bruce since they had gotten close towards the end, two “monsters” looking to connect with another. After the “Civil War,” Tony made sure to personally go through every file he could find that was dumped during SHIELD’s collapse as well as scour through the records of those closest to him--who _were_ closest to him--and that meant digging up every secret, diving through all the red in her ledger to find anything and everything else that could be used against him--used against her, against _them_ \--since, apparently, he couldn’t trust _anybody_. He learned about the Red Room there, figured out about her scar by reading between the lines, too. Well, that and the CCTV footage from the hospital. He had his eyes poking around everywhere after the first news of Fury's 'death’ popped on his radar, even if he didn't quite connect all the dots at the time. It pays to be paranoid every once in awhile.

But the fact that she’s bringing it up so casually is either a nod to the fact that she truly believes this nonsense that’s become his life and assumes that he knows already--thus, taking the power to use it against her away from him--or it’s a warning of all that she is capable of. It could be both. She’s reserved around him, clearly cautious, but still trades nickname for nickname. She’s protective, but only when he’s visibly unnerved by Rogers and likely because of perceived debt or recognition of his hierarchical value more than anything else. A mix of ally and enemy behaviour--like Loki, though neither would appreciate his comment--toeing the line until the cards are fully revealed and they can choose the winning side. He’s not sure what to make of the fact that it feels like Loki is more in his corner than she is right now. But he needs her on his side for this.

Tony sighs and tries to hold his exasperation at bay. “Then can you be Natalie for a minute longer?”

She tips her head slightly. “If you make it worth my while, perhaps.”

He rolls his eyes but starts right away. “Take a look into your shadow-organization--it’s more shady than you think and deeper-rooted than you’d like. Don’t tip Pierce off, he’s basically the head of the beast.” Her eyes gleam so he assumes he’s got his former personal assistant’s attention. “I know it’s profiling, but if they’ve got a German name, I wouldn’t take any chances. And absolutely find a way to take down Rumlow and Helmut Zemo--oh, the base in Siberia, it’s abandoned, but I’d make sure they’re aren’t any more ghost stories lurking around first.

“Keep an eye on the Maximoff twins if you find them.” He hesitates, but swallows and continues on. “They’ll need...help I can’t give, but they can probably still be useful. Ivan… He wants revenge on me so I don't think he'll be a problem. The Mandarin though, you can ignore him--he’s a disguise for Adrian Killian and AIM’s ‘experiments.’ I don’t know if he’ll go as public without me there to antagonize him, but he’ll go after the company and Pepper still, probably. Maya Hansen’s good, you just gotta remind her, I think--fuck, don’t let SHIELD run the local clean-up crew off without a decent severance. There’s a guy, Toomes--”

“Minute’s up,” she says, but the furrow in her brow means she’s taking it seriously. He lets out a breath of relief, not sure how much more he even had to give.

“Thanks,” he mumbles eventually.

“I’m not doing this for you.”

“I know.”

“Why not go to Fury?”

“Because I trust you.” He gets an eyeroll back and huffs. “Fine. I trust that you’ll do the most collective good with the foreknowledge--minimize risk to yourself, which, in turn, minimizes the collateral damage because you’re thorough enough to account for every eventuality in your plans.”

‘Well… Most of the time’ he corrects in his head, inwardly wincing as he is reminded of how she was a part of the unfortunate SHIELD dump.

She raises an eyebrow and gives a slow but true smile. “You’ve got a lot of faith in someone you don’t actually trust.”

“What can I say?” He shrugs, a half-smile of his own touching his lips. “I’ve got a soft spot for spiders.”

She glances at him curiously, before giving a short nod. “You’re keeping gods waiting, tin can.”

“Well, what else would you expect from someone with textbook narcissism?” He winks, watching her slow blink in response before he turns back to his royal transport party.

“Ready now, Virðuligr-Anthony?” Thor asks while Loki sneers at Natasha and probably Barton too. He's not sure where the disdain for the _both_ of them comes from exactly and he doesn't think he wants to know. It's safer the less he knows what goes on behind those curtains.

Tony takes a deep breath and grabs a spot of the handle of the Tesseract. “Ready.”

With a nod, Thor and Loki twist their grips and a column of light burst up into the sky and he feels a little like being disintegrated and stretched out on a taffy machine at the same time.  It's exactly what content aware scale effects in real life would be, if one could even comprehend all that entails.  After no time at all--after all the time in the world--there is finally something under his feet.

And Tony is in awe.


	5. Two: Part Five

Asgard was immense. A great wall to rival China encircling a plane of existence no bigger than America and as seemingly densely populated as India. There were glittering structures everywhere that he could see like fingers pointing to the sky in the same metallic design that scifi novels promised him, but etched into the side and tops are symbols he could only associate with ancient Vikings. In the spaces without towers, vast greenery. The sky, though marked with flying craft of all kinds drifting along with ease, was clean and pure. The light of their sun piercing through the cotton-candy swirled clouds like honeyed amber. If he had to picture it, this would be very close to heaven.

And beneath him, as solid and almost see-through as crystal, is the famous rainbow bridge. It's...uglier than he expected but he understands where the name comes from. Each beam of differently refracted light is present, if a little duller than he assumed it would be, and spasming wildly which, if that spherical structure in the distance behind them is supposed to be it's directional source, yeah, that makes sense. His eyes catch on the jagged edges and chasm between the shattered hole in the bridge and his breath catches, taking two quick steps away from it as possible before his mind can conjure more images of space and voids and--

A hand lays itself like a drifting feather on his shoulder; long fingers gently, but insistently, turn him away. Of course, Loki. He meets his eyes, sees his understanding, and casts his eyes down with a cough to clear his throat. "Ah, so, where to?"

"We must journey through the city and into the heart of Asgard," Thor jovially states--a little too jovially, he thinks. "Where we shall be met by Odin, ruler of the Nine Realms, and ask for an audience."

"We have to _ask_ your father for permission to speak with him about the fate of the _universe_?" Tony nearly splutters. He gets that Kings are busy, a King of all the Nine Realms must be even more so, but one would think this would be a bit more pressing.

Loki sneers. "So you see the inherent problem that lies within Asgard's walls--respect for tradition supersedes all common sense." But his hand moves from Tony's shoulder to press lightly at his back and push him forward.

"Loki..." Thor chided, but it was more of an obligatory huff, especially accompanied with a shake of his head as he too started making his way forward.

Loki must have noticed too, because Tony caught a hint of a smile before it disappeared. "You must admit, brother, Asgard has it flaws."

"...Aye," Thor says after a moment, soft and when Tony dares a glance, his eyes almost looked wet. Loki hadn't noticed his slip yet. And they had only just pasted the first entryway into the city. He had to come up with something to cover up quick if he wanted to keep their personal momentum going.

"Wait a minute--" he pauses, verbally and physically. "If we had the Tesseract, why did we have to walk all this way? Couldn't we have at least popped outside the kingdom gates?"

The demigods share a look. Loki raises his eyebrow and Thor sighs, a sheepish expression falling over his face. "We thought you might appreciate the scenic route, Vir--"

"Uh, no, try again." Tony slices a hand through the air and crosses his arms. "And you can stop with the 'Virðuligr' nonsense. If you say something enough times, it loses it's value. So save it for when we have company."

"Very well, Anthony," Loki inclines his head. "While Thor is not speaking falsely--we did think you might appreciate the view and the walk after your first time using such methods of transportation--but...it is a stalling method for both your sake and mine."

"Loki is still considered a criminal for his actions prior to Midgard," Thor picks up. "Undoubtedly the All-Father has sensed our use of the Tesseract, and if not he, then Heimdall the All-Seeing has notified him. The longer we take to get there, the better chance Loki has to be pardoned."

"...I don't get it." He drops his arms and continues walking. "Wouldn't that just make him angry that you're so late?"

"What Thor means to say, is while Odin's word is law, he is not the only one on the throne," Loki explains, falling in line a bit further away than he started. Tony notes it with a frown.

"The Queen?"

"Precisely. Odin may indeed be slighted by our tardiness, but Mother is skillful in managing his temper where possible. Our absence, while he stalls court function at the expectation of our arrival and subsequent trial, provides the necessary diversion needed to sway his mind."

"And how long do we have to walk to get there?"

"It is merely five of your Earth-miles to get there," Thor cheerfully states. "Though, we may stop at the market on our way for refreshments and to have you meet our people. I believe you may be most interested in our blacksmiths."

Tony gaped at Thor. " _Five_ \--Great, no fantastic. I love that idea, buddy." He gives Thor a friendly slap on the arm that he probably doesn't even feel and then points his finger in Loki's face. "I hope you appreciate the walk, because I'm doing it for your benefit _only_."

Loki actually bows at the waist while still walking. "I am most honored then." He adds a wink and a smirk to punctuate it.

Tony rolls his eyes and then huffs. It's not like he's out of shape so much, but _five miles_? That's still over an hour's worth of walking. Cementing Loki as an ally better be worth it. Given how creative he can be even while under the enemy's control, he thinks it will be so, but he's also a tricky one and Tony has very little additional knowledge or relevant foresight from his trip to be of help regarding the God of Mischief or Asgard. And, if Loki turns out to be a lost cause, at least he can find out more about this whole Norn-thing.


	6. Two: Part Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say thank you guys for all the support in reading and commenting. I do truly appreciate every little bit, even if I haven't gotten around to actually responding like I try to. Thank you so much.

\--

They do indeed hit up the market since it was a mild detour only a quarter of a way their journey through. It reminded him of the Stark Expo with the many different stands in a circle formation and the ever present crowd, the excited murmuring like a soundtrack of contentment even though this must be a commonplace thing on Asgard. And the blacksmith shops from Asgard and Nidavellir--(land of the dwarves he finds out and dwarves...are _nothing_ at all like what Earth has taught him to expect)--but, well, if he thought Asgard was the picture of paradise, then the shops are _truly_ what it means to be in heaven. Even if it is mostly weaponry and armor on display, the craftmanship, the foreign materials so sharp and clean...the engineer in him is absolutely geeking out. It's also the only time Loki is near him since they entered the confines of Asgard proper. Hovering at his back with just enough space between them to not cross the line of impropriety, he whispers secrets and knowledge that he must have researched, bribed, or stole about the crafts and their craftsmen. He guides, without ever touching, his hand over the more valuable pieces and telling him what they are really worth to barter more effectively. Thor is some feet away in his peripheral, arms crossed and standing guard to keep nosy Asgardians and tourists away--from them at least, he's more than willing to spare a nod and smile for his own behalf. Because of it all, and the soft smile on Loki's face as he conjures gold to pay for the one item that won't leave Tony's attention, it was perhaps one of the most intimate moments in his life. And, again, he doesn't know what Loki stands to gain or what he even wants out of this moment.

Well, the obvious thing is his freedom, to be pardoned. But Tony was going to help with that anyway. Loki is not only a great guide--evidence a: their whole interactions at the market--but also his biggest lead. Frankly, Tony trusts that Loki has the most valuable knowledge of Norn-business outside of perhaps this Odin guy, and, maybe more importantly, has personal knowledge about Thanos and part of his plan of attack. So, naturally, the obvious thing Loki wants is one thing Tony needs to have happen. And even though this whole detour and stalling tactic is for Loki's benefit, he noticed how stiff and distant he got as soon as they passed that first entryway. That is, except when they got to the blacksmiths. Then it was like the playful, helpful Loki he glimpsed from before. It's almost like Loki just _wants_ to do this for him...because he wants to make Tony happy. And that's what's confusing him. What has he done to earn all his admiration?

How will he be able to keep it?

"This is a remarkable piece you've chosen, Anthony," Loki murmurs, picking up the golden half-gauntlet with engraved swirls all around the wrist and slipping it onto his right hand.  It pulls him out of his head. It's actually more of a wristlet than anything else, he notes. Actually, it's very similar to his watch-gauntlet that he used in his first confrontation with the Winter Soldier. It's a solid gold all around but, given this is Asgard and especially the fact that it lays across his skin with all the heaviness of silk, he's willing to bet it's not made out of any gold known to him.

With a gentle counterclockwise twist from Loki, the gears click near silently and it conforms perfectly to his hand. "Do you see these sigils?"  His forefinger slides over the swirls and runes that decorate his wrist while his other hand still holds Tony's hand in place.

Tony swallows. "Yeah...?"

"They tell the tale of Asgard's first mighty hero, Sigurd." His finger keeps trailing over the inscription, his green eyes intent on reading out loud to him.  Tony is transfixed. "He wielded a sword named Gram to defeat Fafnir, a cursed dragon, and in the process of Fafnir's defeat, Gram was instilled with truth magic strong enough to pierce through any lie. After Sigurd's death, Gram was destroyed and its pieces scattered across the realms. Many have tried to recover the pieces, to put Gram back together for their own purposes, but all have failed.

"But what our Master Craftsman does not realize, else our bargaining would not have been so fruitful, is--"  Another twist, this one flicking his wrist up and out of the way for a jagged golden dagger to spring free.  Or, what appears more likely, a single remain of a shattered sword used as a dagger.  Tony glances up to meet his eyes and Loki raises an eyebrow and then nods.

Loki returns the hidden piece and releases his hand. "Guard it well, Anthony."

"With my life," Tony promises immediately, fervently.

"Good," Loki nods once more.  His eyes cast around them and he takes a step back, face going blank and sucking up the warmth that Tony had just seen.  He feels oddly bereft, almost as if he's actually gone cold as well.

Thor places a hand on both of their shoulders.  Tony jumps slightly. "Shall we onward, then?"

"Yeah," Tony looks once at Loki, who no longer will meet his gaze, and stifles a sigh.  He doesn't like it, but he's starting to read between the lines here.  For whatever reason, Loki feels like he's not allowed to show closeness to them in public, but especially Tony.  Only in secret moments, and even then, carefully so.  He doesn't know if it's because they are both outsiders in Asgard's eyes--a Midgardian and a criminal, if the truth about his parentage was kept a secret--or maybe something more familiar that keeps him distant.  Understandable, but still mysterious.

"Yeah," Tony continues, flicking his gaze back over to Thor. "Let's keep going."

\--

The rest of the walk is quiet, not quite somber but something approaching it.  Even Thor's only somewhat forced cheer that had been present their entire trip has started to peter out.  Loki trails behind, almost looking like a cuffed prisoner in demeanor.  Tony is already drained from the walk, much less the emotional and mental journey he has undertaken from the start of when he "woke up."  His mind has been going wild in the absence of conversation, thinking and overthinking and trying to prepare somewhat for meeting with an actual King over something so important.  He does a lot of his best work while improvising, but it feels a little wrong to rely too heavily on that here. Not to mention, there is the very real possibility that if he fucks up somehow now, it's not just his life on the line. Historically, he doesn't have a great track record when it comes to that. It's maybe a _little_ too much pressure for him to take right now, he will admit. But it's a little late for second thoughts now.

In much too soon of a period, they finally approach the steps to the castle.  A very tall black Aesir stands before them, gold armor from head to toe, casually resting his hands atop an equally tall sword pressed into the ground beneath him.  They stop a good five feet away.  "Thor Odinson, have you brought Loki Odinson to be seen by our King?" His smooth voice booms.  Loki tenses almost as soon as his name is spoken.

"Aye, Heimdall, I do."

Heimdall's bright eyes observe Loki from head to toe.  Tony can feel how measuring the stare is even without being the receiver.  They return to address Thor. "He is not dressed as a criminal?"

Tony bites his lip to stop himself from interjecting on so many levels.  He knows this is not the time nor the place, _yet_.  "Aye. My brother is no criminal."

There is a pause where Heimdall's sharp gaze lingers on Thor, but the demigod stands firm and elucidates no further.  Finally, he moves on, although it's not much better because now Tony is under inspection. "You bring a mortal to King Odin's court?"

This time Thor takes a step forward, sparing Tony the heavy weight.  He tries to exhale quietly.  "It was necessary--"

"--It is forbidden. Are both the sons of Odin to be on trial today?"

"He is Virðuligr!"

Heimdall's eyes close. "Then it is as I suspected." He steps to the side, allowing them to pass. "Make haste. The Queen has done everything she can to ease the burden you three now bear."

Thor nods, and starts to ascend at a more hurried pace than Tony can easily keep up with though Loki has no trouble, despite making sure he is as far away from Heimdall as one can be.

"Anthony Starkson," Heimdall calls out, just as he passes by.  Tony half-turns.  It doesn't go unnoticed by either of them that Loki also pauses.  Thor does as well, but he stays on the step he already was on; Loki actually returns a few more down.  "Your journey will not be pleasant."

"I wasn't expecting it to be," he retorts.  He can't help but be a little snippy after his cold words regarding him and Loki.

Heimdall inclines his head in acknowledgment. "No being that has been Norn-Chosen has survived their trial without suffering and immense personal sacrifice, including the Aesir. Make sure you place your trust wisely, or you doom all life in the universe."

"I'm aware of what's at stake," he spits now. "And I'm _sure_ I have."  He turns around, almost glad to be stomping away at their hurried pace.

"There is no loyalty in the heart of a trickster, Starkson," is bellowed after him, but, thankfully, they actually enter the castle and a satisfying thud of doors shutting behind them get to be the last word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes:
> 
> Sigurd and Gram actually are a part of Norse myth, but I've taken a comic adaptation (aka the truth powers) of their story and then added my twist onto it. Fun fact! It's actually supposed to be Loki's sword in the comics, so did Loki know it was there? Did he purposefully lead Tony to it? Who knows...


	7. Two: Part Seven

Tony takes a few more steps inside the great halls--and normally, he would be more interested in the architecture or at least the several guards standing around witnessing all that is said and done--but he is too angry to care further and spins to face Loki. " _Ugh_. Is that guy normally such a stick in the mud?"

Loki's eyes are wide with surprise, his mouth slack but still pleased, and glances to Thor without saying anything. A moment passes and Thor rolls his eyes at the grin Loki clearly struggles to suppress.

"No." "Yes." They both say at the same time.

Thor huffs, and reaches out to grab the inside of Loki's forearm. "Quiet, both of you. We must approach the All-Father without further delay or speech." Loki goes blank again and almost limp, he's so pliable in Thor's hold, while Tony follows with a frown.

It doesn't take any time at all to enter what must be the main hall seeing as there is a raised platform seven steps up, in which an old bearded Aesir sits upon an elegant throne. There is a massive display behind him that looks like it has a celtic X-Men symbol in the center of it, framed by cartoonish half-moon wings out from behind the arms of the throne--which also have gargoyle-esque Viking helmets with legs on either side. It's certainly...imposing. A refined woman in long green dress, hair loose in slight reddish curls stands just to his left. Just as Thor finally reaches the center of the circle artwork on the floor, bending on one knee before his father and King, she breaks from position to sprint towards them.

"Loki!" She cries out, almost as if afraid that speaking too loudly would spook him from her.

Trembling slightly, Loki reaches out and catches her in a bone-crunchingly tight embrace. The initial impact looks (and sounds) like it must have hurt, but the way they squeeze themselves together, cheek against cheek, arms curled like snakes in the middle of constricting, Loki's face so concentrated as if he has to commit this moment to memory fully...it must be the kind of hurt that feels so good. Several moments pass, the two slightly swaying in their reunion, until Loki starts to gradually slip away. He holds her at arms length, studying her face. "I...have missed you so, Mother."

She half-gasps, half-laughs, covering her mouth with her hand. A tear must fall since Loki smooths away her skin a second later. "Oh, my son," she whispers. "Long have I feared I would never hear those words again."

"Fear not, Mother. I will do everything in my power to prevent it coming true," he promises, sealing his words with a kiss to her hands.

"Loki." The King, Odin, booms as he rises from his seat. Tony startles a bit, but mostly from the swift change in atmosphere like a literal temperature drop. "Approach."

Oh _boy_. Asgard may look like the future, but he's starting to see where the drawbacks are coming into play. And maybe why Loki has been acting so hot-and-cold. Speaking of--

Loki drops his mother's hands and glances quickly at Tony. The desperation there puts Tony even more on edge and Loki shakes his head once, intently. Tony huffs, quiet and discrete solely between the two of them, but gives a subtle nod of acquiescence. He understands complicated father relationships--is starting to put together _their_ specific complications--and it must be worse when your dad figure is this guy whose in charge of pretty much everything. Loki closes his eyes and exhales in a small moment to himself, before following Thor's lead.

He falls gracefully to one knee, head bowed low. "I present myself to you, All-Father, for your judgement."

"Then I judge you guilty." Odin pronounces immediately. Both sons raise their heads in shock.

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!" Tony can't help but interject, striding in front of the still-kneeling demigods.

"Stark!" Loki hisses, but Tony ignores him.

"What about the evidence? You can't just--"

"Anthony, you must not--" Thor attempts, but Tony shushes him with a violent wave of his hand.

"This is not fair! Loki is innocent of his crimes and you know it." He shoves a finger in Odin's direction before he realizes the potential mistake. "Uh..."

Odin says nothing, his one-eyed stare creepy in a way Fury could never manage, and then he steps down to ground level. Thor and Loki both scramble to their feet and sandwich him slightly behind them. He's grateful for their protection--it actually does touch him that they'd defend him against their own father--but this isn't the time. He has to prove himself as an equal not only for his own sake, but Loki's. He presses forward, paused only by Loki's grip on his left wrist.

"Anthony, please..." Loki quietly begs into his ear. "Rethink this. You have nothing to gain."

"And you have everything to lose," Tony quickly responds. "Loki, just...you've got to trust me on this."

He watches Loki's throat bob before he unfurls his hand and lets Tony go.  Tony watches him a moment longer and then stands to meet Odin face to face.  Odin peers down at him and Tony forces himself to be unflinching, if uncertain, under his gaze.

"I am impressed by your fortitude and passion...for a mortal." He begins, and just as Tony started to relax, he tenses up again. "You stand before me, in utter disrespect of the customs of my people. You trifle in affairs you know nothing of, and speak of things you know nothing of! Why should I listen to you?"

Tony licks his lips. "Because I'm right."

"Indeed you are," Odin admits with a slight nod. His heart skips a beat, confusion warring with hope. "But only of the crimes committed during his time on Midgard. The crimes Loki has committed before his fall are numerous and severe, and I have seen and heard, or been actively present to all the evidence I need to know this. Therefore, my judgement stands."  He drops his spear, still in his hand from his trip down from his throne, twice upon the floor.  The sound echoes throughout the entire room and brings menacing-looking guards into their line of sight.

Odin turns away from him while Tony tries to come up with something to fix this mess, and stands before Loki. "Due to your Mother's pleas, I shall spare your life--though you will never see her again as you will spend the rest of your days in the dungeon."

"Odin!" The All-Mother rebukes. "This is not what we discussed."

"I have given Loki my mercy as you wished. He yet lives, does he not?"

"Life in solitude, forbidden from a mother's love is not a life--"  Loki silences her by taking her hands in his.  Her eyes are wide and red with tears unshed. "Loki..."

"Be at ease, Mother. I must accept my punishment, and I will do it gladly." He kisses her hands again, but this time also her forehead.  Tears fall at his soft goodbye.

"No tricks, Loki." Odin warns.  Loki hangs his head for a moment before facing him with a showman's grin, arms wide and free.

"I come as an honest Aesir before you," Loki pauses and tilts his head, faux-thoughtfully. "Well, as honestly as I _can_ , after all."

Something insane clicks in his head at Loki's words and he darts in front of Loki and Odin once more. "What if I can prove it?"

"Prove...?" Odin repeats, his brows furrowing and Tony knows he only has a short period of time to make his case.

"Prove Loki's innocence for all of his crimes--well, the most severe ones, at least."

"I would admit to curiosity as to how you have managed such a thing with my son." Odin says, and Tony thinks he can detect a hint of humor.  It just might work, but...

He looks to Loki, searches those green eyes deeply.  Loki shakes his head.  'Trust me,' he mouths. 'One more time.'  He watches Loki cast his eyes upward, take a deep breath and nod.  His hand twitches at his abdomen and Tony nods in return.

He turns back to Odin with his own showman's grin, twisting the gauntlet on his wrist. "Like this--" and then he pierces Loki with the piece of Gram's blade exactly where he was shown.


	8. Two: Part Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay with this one, I haven't been feeling well and I lost some of my work due to a save error. Please enjoy!

Loki staggers back under the blow, but pulls Tony with him to keep the small shard inside his stomach. Blood wells to the front of his tunic and Tony places his remaining free hand on Loki's waist to stay upright. He hears the All-Mother gasp loudly, sort of registers Thor saying something to keep the peace to someone maybe the guards or Odin or both, but all he can focus on is the blood. There's just so much _blood_. Isn't this supposed to be magic? Why is he bleeding? _Oh god_ , what if this was all a giant mistake?

"Anthony," Loki coughs and Tony summons enough courage to meet his gaze. His face is shifting, fading into blue skin covered with raised texture like someone was filling him in from head to toe. He doesn't know if that's something to be panicked about as well--oh, right, adopted Frost Giant, runt of the litter, his fair skin is a 'lie.' Does this mean Gram is working? Then why is he still bleeding?

" _Anthony_ ," Loki tries again, voice more strained. He looks up again, not sure when he looked down. More of his face and body--in fact, nearly all of him at this point--has transformed into blue, but he's worried about the flecks of unnatural red painting his lips. "You have to _ask_."

"I don't--I don't know what to say. Loki, I--"

Loki pulled his wrist and Tony can almost hear the blade squishing through more flesh. He almost gags. " _Ask_ ," he grits out, looking vicious with the faint pink smeared on his otherwise white teeth and intense red eyes. "Before the truth _kills_ me."

"Why did you fall?" drips out of his mouth before he knows he's going to speak.

"Because my fat-" Loki winces and grunts. "Because I knew anything else I tried to do would never earn Odin's approval and I was tired of trying so hard."

"What did you try?"

"I...introduced one of many secret passageways into Asgard--specifically the Vault--to a scouting party of Jotnar in order to disrupt Thor's coronation and, thus, enrage him into a counterattack." He pauses to breath and Tony really doesn't like how winded he sounds. "I wanted to expose Thor as not ready for the throne and to, perhaps, allow me a fair chance. I didn't--I didn't think Odin would go so far, brother. In my...weaker moments, perhaps I wished and wanted you to know defeat and disgrace like I did, but I never planned to--"

"Peace, brother," Thor rumbles, suddenly at Tony's side. He glances around, and it's just the four of them now--Loki, Thor, him, and Odin--no guards, no All-Mother to be seen. He couldn't even begin to make a guess as to when that happened. "I believe your words."

Relief washes over Loki's face and his jaw slackens--Tony didn't even realize how tightly he had been clenching until now. Belief must be the counter to the...spell or whatever. He kinda gets it. If the whole point is to uncover truth from your victim, then both parties have to believe it's true. But that leaves a lot of leeway. Gram isn't fool-proof, and Loki is much more than a fool--theoretically, as long as he can twist his words to convince Odin, it doesn't have to be the whole truth. 'Best lies and tricks have an element of truth,' after all.  The hard part is getting Odin to believe him since he seems to already have his mind pretty made up.

But if that's the case, why was Loki so afraid to use Gram to his advantage?

"What happened next?" Tony presses.

"In the fight on Jotunheim, an... _inkling_ came into my mind. I went into the Vault to test my theory and confronted Odin for the truth of my heritage. Our resulting argument caused him to enter the Odinsleep suddenly and as Thor was still banished, I was next in line for ascension of the throne."

"Patriarchal bullshit," Tony mutters, but Loki is close enough to hear and laughs.

"Perhaps. Regardless, I hoped that I could prove my worthiness to Odin through time spent as the de facto King in his absence. In order to better secure my chance of success, I went to Midgard and misled Thor about Odin's condition and exile. I wanted--I _needed_ time to finally earn the respect that Thor had so freely been given in Odin's eyes. But, there are many in Asgard who also have their doubts, and when I refused to end Thor's punishment early, Sif, the Warriors Three and Heimdall conspired to return him--"

"Heimdall has sworne an oath to obey whomsoever sits upon the throne." Odin finally speaks, taking a few steps to be at their right, mirroring Thor on their other side.  Tony feels that he is standing much too close for his comfort.  Loki, too, given the way he hunches some at his arrival. "He would never break a vow--not even for you, as you might think. Perhaps they had found one of your passages."

"Impossible. Hogun is the only one of them capable of utilising the passageways, and his seidr is too weak and untrained to take himself and escort the others. Using the Bifrost is the only way," Loki ends on a quiet note, raising his head to meet Odin's gaze.  They stare at each other but Tony can't read what goes on beyond that.  There must be something, because Loki has been avoiding everyone's gaze since he's gone blue.  It must be something of a novelty given how uncomfortably tense Loki has been--even beyond the pain and strain he must be under from Gram's influence.  But Thor has practically been on his side since the start of this impromptu interrogation and Odin--who has known for centuries probably--has not removed his gaze yet and is finally actually _seeing_ his adopted son in more ways than one, even if it's not the way Loki intended.

"Aye, All-Father," Thor murmurs after another moment of this endless staring.  Tony sees the way his eyes move to the corner towards Thor, but not actually move away from facing Loki. "I can confirm that this is true."

Only now does Odin turn away from them all, taking a few steps to stare around him as he thinks.  His eyes land upon the ceiling and stay there for a moment, a frown appearing.  Tony glances up as well, but all he sees is a painted depiction of a battle around the edges of a giant self-portrait--must've been from many years ago, given how much younger he looks--and even more gold.  He keeps his distance, but turns back around. "Continue, Loki."

Loki takes a deep, sudden breath, like coming back from an out-of-body experience or, more likely to be the actual case, as if he had simply held his breath the entire time. "I was running out of time. I, uh, I fell prey to desperate thoughts. There were only two things keeping me from proving my worthiness to the throne as I saw it: Thor,"  Red eyes dart towards his brother.  Thor gives an encouraging nod. "-And the Jotnar."

"Thor was-- _should_ \--have been simple. I recalled witnessing the effortless dispatchment of my false alarm by the Destroyer, and so I sent its eyes towards my brother on Midgard. But, Thor, the oaf," his words are undercut by a small smile. "Ruined my efforts with ease, and proved himself worthy once more before I had even truly begun. I only had once more chance and I had to make it count.

"I tricked Laufey and paved the way for an assassination attempt, and staged my own rescue which was immediately foiled by Thor's return. I had lost _everything_ in that moment. There would be no throne for Loki _ever_ , not as the second prince of Asgard, and certainly not as Laufey-slayer, so why not? Why not destroy the rest of Jotunheim and become Loki, son of none? At least then I could stand in my own right and not seconded to anything or anyone.

"But you told me 'no.'" Loki closes his eyes but Tony can still see all the pain etched into his face--pain not from Gram, but from Odin's callousness. "And so...I fell. Deeper into madness, and then madness not of my own mind. I was told Midgard had some...priceless artifacts the Other--"  Eyes still closed, he turns his face to the side with a mean grimace.

" _Thanos_ ," he grits out. "The Mad Titan covets the Stones. And he will do anything to possess them. It may not been of his hand, but it was of his will that he took my mind from me--though he granted me some freedom in return so that I might do his work for him."

He opens his eyes directly looking to Odin, some of the madness he was speaking of clear still in them. "I plotted against him, for you. I thought, perhaps, I might finally be rewarded for my efforts if I did what none thought me capable of and acted for the benefit of Midgard and the whole Nine Realms. I do not say I succeeded--I slipped, I forgot who was Loki and who was his toy--until released from his control by the Avengers, but I tried. Father, I _tried_. Please, you have to believe me, for once in your--"

"Loki!" Tony interrupted, breathless.  He stopped mid-speech to glance at Tony now, eyes bright and confused. "Look," he gestures to his whole body.

It was no longer Jotunn blue and his eyes were back to green.


	9. Two: Part Nine

Loki looks down and then back up at Tony, utter confusion written into the lines on his brows. He looks back down, hands finally pulling away with a shake as he observes them intently and then uses them to thoroughly inspect the rest of his visible skin. Tony uses this time to gently twist the gauntlet and eases the retraction of the blade. He figures--he hopes--that this means it is no longer needed and no longer causing pain and possible death. His hands go back almost immediately to steady Loki--and it's a good thing; as soon as Gram is removed, a puff of shocked air falls out of his lips and his knees tremble dangerously.

"Hey, whoa, easy there, Reindeer Games," he murmurs as Loki sags gratefully, allowing Tony to take some of his weight. "You're good, we're good, it's all okay."

" _Anthony_..." Loki whispers, awed and hopeful.

"Loki, my son," Odin interrupts, voice heavy with grave vibrato. They both tear their gaze away from one another in an almost violent method. "I owe you my deepest regrets. I had hoped to spare you the legacy--but sometimes fear corrupts even the strongest of hearts. In light of these truths, I deem you not guilty of the charges against you, as you have already undergone punishment and redemption while on Midgard and were compromised by the emotions of yourself, the people who were meant to serve you and...my faulty parenting."

"There is much we need to discuss, my sons." He glances at both of them solemnly in turn. "And, of course, the mortal you have brought which is its own violation no matter the reason." He sighs heavily and looks the part of not a wisen King, but a father of troublesome kids overdue a nap for his own sanity.

"The day weighs far too much on me already. We shall reconvene tomorrow in my chambers to discuss those matters. I only ask that you both confine yourself to as little interference outside the palace as possible--your mother shall receive your guest and I shall send our healers to your quarters, Loki--"

"Thank you, Father," Loki interrupts, pulling Tony's hand to fit in his elbow. "But I request that I am allowed to receive _Anthony_ so that he may tend to my wound instead."

Odin stands straighter and Tony wants to sweat under the absolute glare he is given. Loki, aside from the slightest bit of color in his cheeks, stays collected. "I see," he says, each word like it was scraped out from his teeth. "I shall allow it."

Loki only nods, a quick breath in, and then darts as quickly as he can out of the room, half-dragging Tony out with him. Tony only barely gets a chance to sense Thor lingering for a more proper goodbye. No words are spoken during the trip to Loki's private chambers. One, because Loki was deathly intent on getting there and nothing else, and two, because Tony was struggling just to keep up with him.  Only once they arrive at his door, does Loki slow and sigh, releasing his tight hold on Tony

"Okay," he begins, easing himself into the conversation as he eases out of Loki's grip. "I'm not exactly sure what went down, but I do know you _heavily_ implied that we were boyfriends or something."

Loki's cheeks actually redden. "Cease your drivel," he hisses in response.

Oh, no.  Loki's way too cute like this to leave it at that.

He smirks and crosses his arms. "Something you want to tell me, Lokes?"

Loki pinches the bridge of his nose. "You are _much_ too annoying for me to ever wish in my bed, firstly. And--" He cuts himself off, glancing up at the hall to their right where the All-Mother had come to stand before them.  "Mother..." he greets weakly.

"I heard you refused treatment by our most skilled healers for a Midgardian who has no knowledge of the arts," Her eyes twinkle with mischief as they land on Tony. " _And_ that you named in front of the All-Father."

"It's not what it sounds like!" Tony blurts out.

She chuckles warmly. "Oh, I know that. What I do not know is _why_ my son would lie about it." Her eyes go back to Loki and she tilts her head, one eyebrow raised, waiting.

Loki's eyes flicker back and forth.  It's clear he's trying to come up with a response that isn't the full truth, but close enough, before he breaks. "I have private matters I wished to discuss with Anthony in as timely a manner as possible."

She nods, accepting his words at the loss of her mirth. "Anthony, is it?" She asks him now, moving to step directly in front of him.

Tony stands up straighter. "Yes, your Highness."

"Please."  She dismisses his honorific and opens her arms.  Tony looks to Loki first before cautiously accepting her embrace.  She squeezes him softly and whispers at his ear, "Thank you, for everything you did on my son's behalf."

"Uh, it was my pleasure?"

She hums for a moment.  And then her arms grow tight-way too tight.  She starts to squeeze him with near the full strength of an Aesir, punching the wind out of his lungs. "But if you _ever_ attempt such volatile sorcery at my son's expense again, I shall have you tied to a rock and fed poison until Ragnarok. Do you understand, Anthony of Midgard?"

He gasps and nods frantically.  With another hum, she releases him and he immediately doubles over to just breath.

"Mother," Loki chides, but the traitor has a wide grin.

"I cannot by Asgardian law defend you as such to the All-Father, but I shall be damned to Hel if I do not defend you by virtue of motherhood," She explains to them both. "I bid you good night."

"And I as well," Loki responds with an incline of his head.  Tony gives a mild wheeze and a wave, much to her amusement.

"Come," he says after watching her leave for a minute or two.  He opens the door with a look of mild apprehension and a shade of something else. "There _is_ something I need to tell you."


End file.
